


TFW you're minding your own business and that one guy you sent home ages ago somehow finds his way back to you

by mezzosesu



Category: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse (2018)
Genre: Dimension Travel, Gen, Kinda Vague how Peter makes it back but don't worry about it, Peter doesn't say it but he's probably worried about Miles, Post-Canon, Slice of Life, Spider-man shenanigans, Written exclusively for one(1) particular line of dialogue, and I'm sure that feeling runs both ways
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-14
Updated: 2018-12-14
Packaged: 2019-09-18 08:38:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16991664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mezzosesu/pseuds/mezzosesu
Summary: Peter, what are you doing here, didn't we send you back?In which Miles has to deal with Peter B. Parker and gets into shenanigans along the way.





	TFW you're minding your own business and that one guy you sent home ages ago somehow finds his way back to you

**Author's Note:**

> I had this really weird urge to insert the phrase "Weird flex, but ok" into a fic, and it kept bothering me until I finally sat down and wrote this fic. 
> 
> Also got some inspiration from a tumblr post I saw on acceptable Spiderman jobs, where 'guy who stands on street and spins sign for quiznos' made the list.

Miles lets out a yawn as he swings through the concrete jungle of New York, eyes barely open and his spidey-sense the only thing stopping him from careening into the side of a building. He decided at some point in the last month or so to start doing early weekend patrols, you know, to dissuade crime or whatever, maybe catch a free bagel from Ernie on his way. The good stuff. So far it was panning out pretty nicely, and Miles figures he should stop for a quick second to pat himself on the back for a plan well-thought out.

He turns the corner and lets go of the web, flipping gracefully into a solid landing. A shout of his name and distant clapping comes from behind him, and Miles feels his ego warm at the praise. Finally, some recognition around here for all the hard work he does; all he had to do was put on a mask.

Never one to leave an adoring fan waiting, Miles turns to shoot some finger guns at his admirer and stops as his head thrums with a familiar ache.

_Oh no._

No no no no no. This isn’t happening, couldn’t be happening. There’s no way that he could be here. Didn’t he send all of them back?

The figure in front of him raises a hand in greeting. A familiar red webbed patterned glove juts out from under a tan trench coat, confirming Miles’s fears. “Hey, Spiderman.”

“Pet--I mean, Spiderman?” Miles's mouth gapes open as he looks at Spiderman. Well, another Spiderman. An alternate universe Spiderman: one of the many that he's had the pleasure of meeting. “What are you doing here?”

“Ahh, well, you know,” Peter, well, other other Peter, not quite his Peter and probably not Gwen's Peter either (he could only assume), shrugs. “Multidimensional shenanigans, maybe. Who knows. Curious?”

Yes? “Ye--”

“Wait, before you finish that statement, are you hungry? Because man am I hungry. I could use some food right about now, traveling through dimensions sure takes a lot out of a guy. How about that burger place on 76th st? Your treat.”

“Whoa whoa whoa, hold on!” Miles says, jerking his arm from the hold Peter somehow managed to get him in and planting his feet firmly on the pavement. “I have a lot of questions!”

“And I’m gonna answer them, of course of course.” Miles heaves a sigh of relief. Finally, some answers-- “Right after I get some food.”

“Ughhhhh.”

“Come on pal, you'd treat a friend this way after he's traveled so far to see you? Especially after he saved your universe? How rude, I think you owe me.”

“What?! _I_ took down Kingpin! And _I_ sent you guys back!”

Peter waves a have dismissively. “Poe-tato, Potato, Semantics, shamantics. Doesn't matter, let's go.”

Peter shoots a web out to the nearest building and takes off. Miles watches after him and tells himself not to do it. He can't get caught up in Peter's antics again. He’s Spiderman now; he has a responsibility to New York. He has to watch out for villains. Help old ladies cross streets. Fortnite dance with the local middle-schoolers to get his Twitter views skyrocketing again.

…

“Hey, wait up!”

Annndddd he's getting caught up in Peter's antics again. Great.

The two of them swing over to the place on 76th and grab seats inside at a booth near the  window. A waitress comes over to place water on their table and take their orders, and afterward she glances curiously at the duo before leaving. When she's around the corner Peter sighs and pulls off his mask.

He's looking better, Miles observes. Tired, still, based on the deep, dark bags around his eyes, but his five o'clock shadow is neater and his hair is actually cut evenly instead of the shaggy mess from before. Guess MJ must be doing one hell of a fixer-upper project on this guy.

“I see you know the lay of the city well. For a second I almost believed you know what you're doing. It's good, kid. By the way, you can take your mask off, no one's gonna put two and two together here.”

Miles obliges after a worried glance towards the entrance. He trusts Peter, of course. Definitely. But just in case he slouches lower in his seat to avoid any undue attention. “I know what I'm doing. I've been on the job three months already, you know.”

“Is that right? You been taking that advice I gave you?”

“Which? I mean, you didn't really say all that much, and everything I learned I did myself.” Miles points out. “In fact, the only thing you did teach me was how not to get a rash.”

“Yeah yeah, that's what I mean. It's practical advice, but I got worried that you might've just disregarded it.”

“Of course not, what do you take me for, a fool?” Miles laughs and tries not to dwell on the nasty itch he got for a week because he disregarded Peter's advice. He was, in fact, Booboo the fool.

Peter stares at him, and for a second Miles thinks his cover is blown, but miraculously the tension is broken by the waitress returning with their orders. Miles moves his water out of the way to make space for his tray, whereas Peter just straight up plucks his tray out of the waitress's hands. “Thanks!”

She mutters something unsavory under her breath so the two won’t hear her as she puts on a fake retail smile. “Enjoy your meal!”

She walks away and the two of them dig into their meal. Peter eats with gusto as if he hasn't had a meal in days, and Miles is beginning to suspect that this was just how Peter was. It’s a little gross actually, but Miles isn't about to point it out. Instead, he addresses the cosmic anomaly in the room. “So,” He starts over a mouthful of fries. “How'd you end up here, anyway?”

“Mmm? Mm--” Peter holds up a finger to say ‘one sec’ as he takes another large bite out of his burger. The brown mixture of mustard and ketchup dribble down his chin in waves as he chews, and upon noticing Miles's disgusted look, Peter grabs a napkin and dabs it in the general direction of his face. Somehow he misses the mess entirely.

After taking a long, drawn-out slurp of his diet Dr. Pip, Peter finally answers. “I dunno.”

Miles slaps his hands to his face with a groan. “Are you kidding me?? I waited all this time, watching you eat like--” He gestured wildly at the sodden mess of the mostly-eaten burger on the tray-- “Whatever that was, all for an ‘I dunno’?”

“Well, yeah.” Peter nods.

“Oh my godddd. I coulda been patrolling right now. Or doing homework! Now I gotta watch you.”

“Hey kid, I am an adult. Besides, I have a feeling I was brought here for a reason. Maybe it was to help you with something. To teach you, maybe.”

Miles scoffs and crosses his arms over the table. “What could you even teach me? I'm not like before, I actually know how to do things now. I know how to swing, I can disappear on command, plus I'm a natural at kicking bad guy's butts.”

Peter just hums in response and takes another sip of his drink. The two sit in relative silence, broken only by slurping sounds and crinkling wrapper paper. It's awkward, but Miles isn't really sure what to do about it. Peter isn't supposed to be here, and the fact that he is worries Miles. Is Brooklyn in danger again? Did Dr. Octavius start making another collider? It's terrifying and concerning and it just makes Miles all the more frustrated that Peter doesn't even seem to care!

When the waitress comes to place their check down on the table Miles has calmed down somewhat from what could've been a bad anxiety attack, and isn't even the least bit irritated that he got stuck with the bill again. He smoothes a hand down his side as he feels for his wallet. Huh, weird. He does it again, but again, he doesn't feel his wallet. He switches to the other side, but the same thing happens again. Wasn't the pocket in this suit a side pocket? Could it have been a back pocket instead?

The more Miles feels around, the more it clicks in his head: he's lost his wallet. “Oh no. No no no no no…”

Peter watches with concern from across the table. “Sup, kid?”

“I...I can't find my wallet… I just had it like a second ago,” Miles replies, resorting to feeling all over his suit in any hope of catching a sign of it.

“Ohhh, you didn't put it in the pocket, did you?”

“Yes…?”

“Oh pal, that's a bad idea. You can't trust that pocket. I've lost like three wallets that way.”

“But it's a pocket. Why would I not use a pocket if it's there to function as a pocket??”

Peter shrugs. “Why do pants have pockets that don't fit phones?”

That… was a good point. “So what do we do?”

Peter grabs his mask and pulls it over his hair. “We're gonna turn on the old Spidey charm.”

When the waitress returns, Peter is splayed across the seat, mask on and trenchcoat parted to reveal his spandex-clad legs. Miles almost thinks it could work, you know, if Peter was actually in shape and not basically looking like a creep in a costume. In any case, Miles has his own mask on and is currently pretending to be anywhere else. He should’ve just disappeared, but the waitress already saw him come in with Peter, so instead, he gets to watch this dumpster fire of a performance. Lucky him.

“Hey baby, I'm Spiderman,” Peter croons lowly.

“And I'm tired. You guys done here?”

“Oh--” Peter leans up briefly to stare at the waitress's name tag before falling back into his seductive pose--" _Tori_. Tori Tori Tori. We have all the time in the world to talk about paying. Right now let's just talk about you. And. Me.”

Tori gives Peter a blank stare, and Miles groans as the second wave cringe hits him real hard. “Look, I was supposed to go home half an hour ago. You paying or what?”

“Well--”

“We don't have the money!” Miles interrupts. “I lost my wallet somewhere, I swear we were gonna pay, please don't call the cops.”

Tori sighs heavily. “What a pain. Alright, you guys gotta go talk with my manager, maybe you can figure it out. It's not my problem.” She stalks away, leaving Peter and Miles alone at their table again. Miles hazards a glance in Peter's direction and instantly regrets it. “God, why did we think that would work?”

“Look, I panicked, okay. Let's just get this over with.”

The two of them get up from the table and walk over to the Staff Manager's office. There they talk with the current Shift Manager, an aging bald guy with a toupee that was, quite literally, holding itself together by the last few threads to the side of his head. Despite his questionable cosmetic choices, Dave is a pretty jovial guy and laughs when the two tell them their story of a lost wallet. Miles is sure that Dave doesn't believe them for a hot second and honestly? That's pretty fair. He wouldn't trust him either.

Surprisingly, he doesn't send them to jail or call the cops (read: his dad) or any of that, just asks them to help promote the shop and earn what they owed by flipping some signs on the corner. He says that their costumes are pretty good, look almost authentic, and the novelty of having costumed sign flippers would be great for business.

They weren't really in a position to say no, so the two of them gathered up the signs and headed outside the shop.

Miles looks down at his sign with a small frown. It's large, and while it isn't really heavy per se, it is awkward to hold, let alone flip. The logo for the Burger place stares back at him, and he can't help but let out a sigh from behind his mask. “I've never done anything like this before.”

“Oh yeah?” Peter pauses in his leg stretches and turns to face Miles. “It isn't that hard, I'll teach you. I've done this dozens of times before to get money. I'm basically a pro, like seriously I've been doing this since before you were even born. ”

Miles raises an eyebrow. “Weird flex, but okay.”

“Just watch me and follow along kid, and remember, it's all in the wrist."

As the two take their spots on the corner and begin their display, Miles quickly realizes how hard this is. It seems that no matter what he tries to do, his sign just doesn't want to listen to him. He tries to flip it forward, it goes backward. Sideways? More like all ways. What's he doing wrong? What's the trick? He tries to look at Peter across the street to learn, but it's impossible, he's just too fast. Miles thought he might've been bluffing about his experience doing this, but Peter really was a natural at this, and the crowd was just eating it up.

Miles feels a prickle of shame building on the depths of his stomach, but before it can take root Peter loudly stage-whispers to him. “Hey, stop thinking so hard about it.”

“What am I supposed to do then?”

“Just relax! Let the rhythm come to you.”

Miles lets out a frustrated sigh but actually decides to listen to the advice. He closes his eyes and tries to relax, tapping into his center. In his subconscious he hears the drumbeat of his song, well not particularly his song as he didn't sing it, record it, or have the rights to it, but his in the sense of it was always the one he listens to when he needs to wind down from the day.

The lyrics come to him easily, and his arms loosen with the flow as he gives himself up to the music. The sign falls with his arms and for a second it looks like it'll go clattering to the ground, but at the last second Miles grabs it with the tips of his fingers and flicks his wrist sharply, tossing the sign into a perfect spin upwards. The action is met with a scattering of applause, and Miles smiles behind his mask as he actually gets it, feels how the sign responds to his actions. He glances over at Peter and nearly doubles over in laughter as the cheesy thumbs-up Peter tosses, but he can't but return it just as enthusiastically.

Eventually, the sun sets and nighttime comes, and Dave shoos them away with a quick thanks and a small wad of dollar bills for each of them. Miles goes to stuff the hard-earned cash into his pocket, but quickly thinks better of it and instead stashes it in the chest of his suit. They'll probably be a bit sweaty later, but gross, sweaty cash is still cash nonetheless, at least until he's reunited with his wallet. Speaking of which…

Miles sends off a quick text to his dad telling him to be on the lookout for a wallet in the Lost in Found, and when he's done he turns to Peter, who's buttoning up his trenchcoat. “So, what are you gonna do now?”

Peter scratches his chin in thought. “Well, I'll probably just go home now, I got nothing better to do.”

“Wait, you mean you could've gone home this entire time?” Miles nearly shouts, dumbfounded. “Why did you stay? Why did you force me into feeding you?”

“What, I can't come back and say hello to my cool pal Spiderman every now and again?”

“No??? You can't??”

Peter laughs. He turns away from Miles and flips the jacket hood over his head, obscuring his mask from view. “It was good to see you Miles, glad to see you're doing well for yourself here.”

“Yeah, same.” Miles can't help the small ache in his heart as he answers. It's been so long since everything happened, and after being around so many people like him, it was hard to be alone again. To be the only Spiderman again. He doesn't address it though--some things were better left unsaid. “Give MJ my regards.”

“You don't even know her, but yeah, I'll be sure to say ‘the other friendly neighborhood Spiderman says hello!’ just to really confuse her.” Peter pulls out a small device and presses a button, shooting out a small black hole onto the ground. He turns his head to look at Miles, raising two fingers to the side of his head in a salute. “See ya later, Spiderman.”

Miles returns the salute as Peter jumps into the hole. It hurts, but somehow he knows that isn't the last he'll be seeing of Peter B. Parker.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, I really appreciate it!


End file.
